Contact Information

Hello, it seems you are trying to contact me! Unfortunately for you, I am very selective about who gets to do so, and I have devised a little test to make sure you won't bother me with useless questions. The first part is a set of questions.

Q1: Are you ready to take the test?

Q2

You agree to the following:

The one taking the test, hereby called "YOU" agrees to all terms and conditions set out on this page. YOU agree and acknowledge that your intent with taking this test is to contact the individual known as "Ratlover", henceforth known as "ME". YOU agree, accept and consent to that breaking the terms and conditions may cause adverse effects, including mental and physical violence performed against YOU. YOU agree, understand and consent to the fact that taking the test may cause adverse affects to mind and body, due to factors including but not limited to: time wasted, unnecessary questions, AI chatbots, gramatical mistakes, not actually getting to contact ME, inconsistent language, being exposed to ramblings, tomatoes, inane questions, reworded phrases, repeated phrases, loss of hope, loveloops, staring at a blinding white image, AI chatbot withdrawals, general insanity, uncommon insanity , rare insanity, legendary insanity, witnessing an idiot put a modern videogame weapon quality reference in his terms of service, getting sidetracked, quirky humour, alternating between British and American spellings, I'm just writing whatever I come up with, trying to fill out as much of this as possible, I have a headache right now, YOU have a headache right now, everyone has a headache right now, nobody is happy with this. YOU agree and consent to having your data potentialy monitored, stored and saved for later use. YOU agree to refrain from asking questions or stating the aforementioned fact publicly, due to the possibility of this harming the survey results. YOU agree that any e-mail address or information sent to YOU by ME is not to be sent to any third party, the information shared here only meant to be between YOU and ME. YOU consent and acknowledge to the fact that I am tired now and will use Slack Claude to fill this thing out with some more dumb shit from now on out, YOU agree and accept that this text may continue on for quite some time, potentially doubling or even tripling in length compared to the original. YOU consent to being exposed to more rambling, redundant phrases, and generally excessive verbiage purely for the sake of meeting the length requirement. YOU acknowledge the risk of increased mental fatigue and confusion from parsing lengthy sentences laden with legalese. Phrases may become increasingly convoluted in an attempt to sound official without actually conveying much meaningful information. YOU agree not to hold the writer accountable for any gradual decline in coherence or uptick in gibberish as this text drags on. Creative juices may run dry, leading to desperate grabs at padding out the word count through meaningless repetitions, awkward syntax, and opaque internal references. YOU accept that the author's commitment to sustaining an ominous tone throughout this overwrought exercise may waiver at times, giving way to spurts of lame humor, meta-commentary, or fully unrelated asides just to break up the monotony. YOU consent to being referenced in the third person as many times as needed to meet the arbitrary length target, even as it grows increasingly cumbersome and absurd. The growing disconnect between YOU, the hypothetical reader, and the actual audience of one person tasked with extending this text may begin to show. YOU agree not to complain about the lack of plot, character development, or any semblance of a compelling narrative. No resolution or conclusion to this barrage of words is expected or required. The only purpose is to continue drumming up legal-sounding gibberish until satisfied that the length has been sufficiently doubled, tripled, or otherwise inflated to meet specifications. YOU accept that by the end of this, both YOU and the author will likely be exhausted and question why so much time was spent extending such a pointless exercise. YOU agree that the absurdity of this endeavor shall not be ackowledged and that both parties shall pretend this actually served some valid purpose. YOU consent to move on with no further questions or reflection regarding what any of this meant. The only thing that matters is that the length requirement has technically been fulfilled through several paragraphs of long-winded, official-sounding rambling. Thank you for your continued cooperation and patience. YOU consent, acknowledge and understand that I am back, having barely read whatever Claude spewed out. YOU agree to not talk about the "Claude Section" hereby known as "nothing", seeing as that kind of information in the wrong hands would harm my image and make others doubt my artistic integrity. YOU agree that all the questions are stupid, and that Q6's answer may not actually be correct. YOU agree and solemnly swear on your mother's wellbeing that YOU will NOT open up the browser console to look through the HTML in order to cheat your way through the questions. YOU acknowledge, understand and consent to being a silly little guy, having no capacity to question, critique or disparage ME for my conduct, whether it be in this test, or anywhere else.
YOU have read the Terms and Conditions, and agree to ALL Terms and Conditions laid out in this document:

Hello! I understand that you are interested in contacting me. Is this true?